Just... fucking... no.

Recent discoveries...
It has come to my attention recently that I may be too smart for my own good. What I mean by that is I have recently taken up arms ethically against perceived atrocities within the technology industry. I'd like to pick up where I left off last...

Three personality types
I hate to do it but I must quantify three distinct personality types. The first is the intelligent log, aka the 'nerd'. A nerd is someone who is so tecnically inclined that they bury themselves in their chosen arena. This type of person is completely detached from the outside world and, therefore, completely incapable of holding an average conversation without offending or "putting off" almost anybody.

The second type of person is the exact oposite of nerd: social overachiever. This personality type tries too hard. The one who considers themselves 'extra special' because they have more friends than computers. In all actuality this person winds up alienating people due to the fact that they try so fucking hard to be everybody's friend they ignore the basic courtesies everyone should be afforded. More on these people later.

The third personality type, the catagory which I fall in to, is the 'geek'. I'm not talking about the Websters dictionary version. No, they would have you believe that geeks and nerds are the same, just interchangeable names. The person I'm talking about is the one in your office who helps you fix your computer or shows you how to use a new program without acting like a condescending asshole. This is the person who offers to fix your computer but shows you the process along the way. The one person in the office who you can go to who a) knows what the hell they're doing and b) doesn't make you feel like a complete fucking idiot in the process.

Scenario: Your office has recently made the upgrade to a new version of the operating systems on your computers. For the most part everything is familiar but there are a few intricacies that you don't know how to set up.

The nerd's solution: Use a lot of technical jargon, describe the process once and expect that you will remember it for all time. While this may work for some you feel like he doesn't want to take the time to help you with it because he thinks such things 'are beneath me'.

The condescending asshole's solution: Don't use a lot of technical jargon and take the time to help. The problem is this type of person over simplifies, making you feel like a preschooler who's being shown how to pull up their pants. This type of fuckhead (as you can most likely tell it's this type of person who pisses me off the most) seems to gain some kind of satisfaction by debasing everybody else because 'they just need to be taught what I know, even if they don't want to hear it'. Fucking bastard assholes.

The average geek's solution: Find out the technical acumen of the person requesting the help and gear the solution and description to their level. The reason I group myself in this category is because I am, by trade and experience, a customer service expert. Even if you are the lowliest tech at the biggest corporation in the world everybody expects that you will be willing to help without resorting to overtly simplistic or technical terminology, i.e. your demeanor is professional without being a jerk or condescending.

What does it all mean?
Well... shit. I just don't know. I would say to take the path less travelled. Three suggestions that I could make to help anybody achieve the status of great technical support rep:
a) Work in a fast food joint at least once. The humility you are forced to undertake gives you the perspective that every blue collar has. You absolutely must realize the level of intellect that you will be dealing with 99% of the time.
b) Be a phone support rep at least once. The ability to convey information through language is an absolute must and this will force you to learn how to control situations that are frustrating for both parties when communication is limited.
c) Learn from mistakes, both yours and others. Pierre and Marie Currie discovered how to halt the progression of cancer cells by working with the basest of chemical and energetic reactions on the cellular level. However this exposed them to a time based radiation sickness. In the current world even children understand the basics of the reactions from radiation exposure and know what the consequences are. This illustrates perfectly the act of learning from mistakes.

I've followed all three of these pieces of advice. I currently work as a phone rep, I just left a job in the food service industry and I've been fucking up for my entire life as well as watching others screw things up. I've learned from all of these situations and I know when to force my hand, when to let others force their will and I now know when someone needs to have a little humility interjected in to their life.

More slack-assery
Ah, you poor uneducated fools. So the number one past time on the net is decidedly porn. The second most popular internet past time is friend to friend communication, whether via email, 'IM' or blogs like this. (warning: possibly insulting material follows. Please don't take any of the following comments to seriously unless you meet all of the criteria for punk ass kid who thinks 1337 5p34k is the 'bomb diggity'.)

For the most part none of you know how to spell. I'm not talking about the people who are educated. I'm talking about the lazy fuckers who would rather text their friends from home than walk the two blocks to talk to them. The spoiled little ass heads whose caudling mother and doting father baught them an xBox for their sixth birthday and a new game every two weeks. The little pricks who have never had to make a living no matter how old they got.

These are the types of children that people have been raising since 1993. I don't know about the rest of you but I bought my first game system, car, computer, etc..., by myself and I'm disgusted to see these kinds of things going on. Back to the point they're also the people who are too lazy to lrn how 2 fukin spel rite. God, that took longer than I would have liked. Seriously it took about 5 seconds longer to write those six words than it did the two sentences before it. Why? Because I'm not some lazy little fuckhead who thinks that it's faster to read and write incorrectly because 'you don't have as many keystrokes'. How about learning to type correctly and well? It really doesn't take that much effort and people don't have to work so hard to understand you.

Dumbass question of the week
This brings me to the dumbest fucking question of the week:
Why do we have to type out the whole sentence? It takes to long and you get the same point accross if you type the 'shrt wy'.
Why you ask? Because it takes too fucking long to decipher which letters you've left out and build a cohesive sentence from the garbledy-gook you call fucking typing. And it bleeds over in to the professional world too. Everybody I know that types like that on IM has at least 5 spelling errors per page. Read one of my rants and you'll see correct spelling the whole way through. Lazy fucktard ass hats.
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Links and other shit
I'm just so pissed off right now. Sorry. I'll try to make your day a little better:

Under Power is the story of Mr. Cynical and his gang of really fucked up 'super heroes' who have to save the world. Read it at your own risk but it's hilarious.

Digital Purgatory is everything we've talked about today. Even the little xBox whores.

Twisted Links. Damn, I want a chainmaille bra! And the chick to wear it in bed!

Cable Organizers: Just another wierd fucking link from me to you.

Thought of the Day
"Always live within your means.
Endeavor to extend them regularly."
Gryyphyn, Section-9/The Wired